December 20th, 2016


no time for your unexamined patriarchal party line

Indy had a dentist appointment today. The dentist, who is a woman, and who keeps up a pretty constant stream of chatter to reassure her child patients, made no fewer than four separate comments to Henry about how “girls talk a lot.”

By the third I was livid. What I do not need is a woman–perhaps ESPECIALLY a professional woman, A DOCTOR–reinforcing stereotypes that my six year old son has *certainly* never come into contact with from me, and which I wish him to be armed to resist when he does. When she did it again I obviously looked disgusted enough that she began to backtrack, but it was too late by then.

“As a matter of fact,” I said, sharply, “statistically, in groups, men talk a great deal more than women, and if women speak as much as *thirty percent* of the time, they’re percieved as dominating the conversation. *Seventeen* percent is regarded as *equal* time. Study after study has backed this up.”

She backed down but then she *said it again*, although she also instantly called herself out on it–“At least, *this* girl talks a lot,” she said, but HOLY SHIT I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR YOUR UNEXAMINED PATRIARCHAL PARTY LINE.


(x-posted from The Essential Kit)