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17 September 2014 @ 01:58 pm
“I’ve always wanted to write a book!”  

At the cafe this morning, people were talking w/site manager about market space. I was listening in & they noticed. Manager says “She’s writing a book!”

One immediately says “I have a great first line for a book: ‘I’ve a terrible secret.’ Isn’t that great? You could get a whole book deal off that!”

I thought, “Uh, no you couldn’t,” and I *said* “So what’s the secret?”

She said “You don’t find out at the end! Keep them for the second book!”

…right then.

Then they asked for my name in case I made it with this book. I said they could find me at Chapters Bookstore under CE Murphy.

Oh, they said, you’re affiliated with Chapters?

I’m not affiliated with them, I said, they just carry my books, and I refrained from adding “you assholes” to the end of that or any other remark.

I’m not really offended; people assume writers aren’t published or are vanity press & local shops are selling them on consignment. But @.@

(x-posted from The Essential Kit)

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Deborah Blakedeborahblakehps on September 17th, 2014 01:55 pm (UTC)
Har. I tell people I have books out (I carry them in the shop, so often I just point at them) and the most common response is "So are you self-published?" or "How much does that cost to do?"

To which I answer, very politely, "No, I have a publisher. I get paid to do this."

To which they usually respond, "Oh, you must make a lot of money, then."

Uh, no.
Anna the Piper: Buhannathepiper on September 17th, 2014 02:15 pm (UTC)
I'll be over here facepalming on your behalf, then!
A large duckburger_eater on September 17th, 2014 03:35 pm (UTC)
This is why I never speak to anyone ever.
(Deleted comment)
kitmizkit on September 17th, 2014 08:24 pm (UTC)
Strangely enough, you are not the only person reminded of that by this. :)
martianmooncrabmartianmooncrab on September 17th, 2014 06:04 pm (UTC)
that because real writers dont write in coffee shops..
anthony_lionanthony_lion on September 18th, 2014 08:08 am (UTC)
The ‘I’ve a terrible secret.’ line belongs up there together with 'It was a dark and stormy night' on the world's most cliche beginnings...

Chris: Hercules90scartoonman on September 22nd, 2014 12:30 am (UTC)
I'd love to hear just how much that woman thought out her book...then exactly what she expects the sequel to be about.
kitmizkit on September 22nd, 2014 06:34 am (UTC)
She hadn't thought out a *book*, she'd thought out a first line! The rest is easy! O.O